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Oct 27, 2011 ~ Love for your member. Your one band member.

Sometimes I close my eyes and imagine I’m on a tropical beach somewhere, sipping mai tais and using the word “fabulous” to describe everything. In this fantasy, I have a gold-encrusted bikini and a killer tan. And I’m surrounded by people who laugh hysterically at all my jokes. In real life, I’m in Wilkes Barre PA, my co-workers seldom get my sarcastic humor, I wear SPF 50, and a gold-encrusted bikini would probably burn my hoo-ha. Guh....Itchy. But it’s fun to imagine, isn’t it?

I also like to imagine the original lineup of Guns n’ Roses getting back together. Another fantasy that will never come true. Guns n’ Roses is my all-time FAVORITE band. I got a rose tattoo on my stomach the day I turned eighteen….. It’s an “Axl Rose”. I know. Stupid….played. But hey, I was eighteen. Could’ve been a locomotive. Could’ve been a November raindrop. Could’ve been a rocket queen. My point: could’ve been sooooooo much dumber. So leave me alone.

I got my GnR tickets for the big show at Mohegan Sun Arena November 20 and I am officially PSYCHED! I’ve been getting a little flak from other diehard Guns fans because I honestly don’t give a crap that Axl’s the only ORIGINAL member on this tour. Big whoop. He was the main songwriter – we all know this. And yes, it sucks ass that they can’t reconcile, but much like we are never again gonna see Meg Ryan’s original face, we must come to terms with these new developments and move on.

Sure, it’s not the same. But it’s still AWESOME.

I’ve been in a rock band myself, and I know first hand how things can go south between band members. Of course, this is different in my case because we made little to no money and had little to no success. The only way we were getting booked at the state fair is if we joined 4-H. But I digress. I just mean to say I have equal sympathy for BOTH sides.

I would LOVE to see Slash, Duff, Izzy, and Steven onstage with Axl again, but let’s be real. GnR is gonna kick ass no matter what! Because those songs are timeless. And Axl’s bigger than life (which is also why he’s a complete f%#king whackadoo). But I love him. I put Kanye in the same category: you’re crazy, but you’re a genius and I love you. Crazy/talented/genius. I’m lucky if I get weird/slow-witted/follower.

So I hope to see you at Mohegan Sun Arena November 20! I’ll bring my 4-H pig. Name’s “Wiggly”. You can pet him. And if you see me down front, I’ll be the girl spazzing out to every song, trying to use my radio station laminates to get backstage (and by “radio station laminates”, of course I mean boobs).


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10/27/2011 10:42AM
Oct 27, 2011 ~ Love for your member. Your one band member.
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