July, 21 ~ racist equals stupid....unless you are a racist
by Lissa,posted Jul 21 2011 8:09AM
Why is it that WHENEVER somebody starts a sentence with “I’m not a racist, but….” you just know whatever follows is gonna be incredibly racist? Same goes for “I’m not sexist, but….” HEY! Here’s a thought: If you’re not a racist, umm.....don’t act like one. If you’re not a sexist, don't act like one. It’s pretty easy.
I was at Quaker Steak & Lube last night for Bike Night (AWESOME by the way – we had a bikini car wash - FUN!), and I went out with the girls afterwards. We were chatting with these two dudes from outta town, and one guy leans into me and goes “Hey, I’m not a racist, but check this out..…” He proceeded to tell the most offensive, racist, UNFUNNY “joke” I’ve ever heard in my life. Strom Thurmond would’ve laughed his ass off and bought this guy a beer. I, personally, just stood there with my mouth agape and didn’t blink for like three minutes.
If you are a stranger and you start telling me racist jokes, you should also start an oven timer on our conversation. I will be gone in twenty seconds. Guaranteed. Somehow I let it slide A LITTLE if I already know you and I know you're not really a racist, OR if you’re older than dirt and you just don’t know any better. I realize that's slightly hypocritical, but older people tend to say things out of ingrained ignorance, not hatred. I'm not excusing it. I'm just saying it's different.
But if you were born anytime AFTER 1970, you have no excuse. If you’re part of my generation and you’re dumb enough to be racist, lemme just clue you in to a few things: The south will NOT rise again. The north won. Get over it. Immigrants belong here just as much as you do – we’re all immigrants. The NATIVE Americans are the only truly indigenous people in this country. If you're gonna hate on somebody cuz they have an accent, or the fact that they “never even bothered to learn our language”, you better be good and damn sure you NEVER make a grammatical error, use street slang, or fail to enunciate your words. Cuz I gotta say – half of the rednecks who grew up here and claim to know our language SO very well, are themselves pretty hard to understand sometimes! I mean “Whatchadoon?” "Yous"? Are these words? I don’t think so.
So my point is this: if you’re trying to impress a girl by telling a joke that’s OBVIOUSLY sexist or racist, don’t say first that you’re NOT a racist. At least have the cajones to admit it. Own it. I may not agree with you but at least I’ll respect you for being authentic. And then I get to test drive my “what’s it like to never get laid?” jokes. See if you make the connection.